Second Coming Recap

At the cabin, the Henrietta Deadite promises that Ash will never get the Necronomicon. Ash yells to Knowby for help, but he runs out with the Book. Henrietta says that no one escapes their destiny, and Ash shoots the Deadite. The shotgun blasts have no effect, and by the time Ash reloads, the Deadite has ducked beneath the stairs. It grabs Tanya and pulls her back, and blood sprays out.

Knowby gets into his and prepares to drive off, but something attacks him from the back seat.

Ash shoots off the lock on the trap door and gets up, and Tanya screams for help. After a moment everything goes quiet, until finally a bloody Tanya peers out... and gets pulled back down. A blonde-haired 80s Ruby comes in with the Book, and she realizes that Ash is the warrior prophesied in the book. Henrietta grabs him and pulls him down into the cellar, just as future-Ruby and Kelly come in. Ruby demands to know why she's there, and future-Ruby says that she came for the Book 80s Ruby is holding. Kelly hears Ash fighting and runs forward, but 80s Ruby knocks her back.

Henrietta tosses Ash around the cellar, but he pokes her in the eyes with her own fingers and hits her with a board studded with nails. The demon shrugs it off and pulls Ash to its breasts, and he kicks her in the groin. As they fight, the projector activates and Henrietta extends its head forward on its elongated neck. Ash grabs the head and punches it, and the Deadite floats into the air. He gets out of the way just in time as it drops, then grabs its head and cuts through its neck with his chainsaw.

Future-Ruby insists that she's the key to 80s Ruby getting everything she wants. Ash climbs out of the cellar and takes in the sight of two Rubys. He tells 80s Ruby about her future, and she's shocked that future-Ruby kills her babies. Future-Ruby says that 80s Ruby can do anything she wants... and 870s Ruby stabs her with the Dagger. Future-Ruby grabs the Book and blasts 80s Ruby back, and tells Ash and Kelly to get out. Kelly refuses to abandon her, and Future-Ruby admits that Ash is all right... sorta. He says that she's okay herself, and Future-Ruby gives Kelly the book and says that she knows what to do.

80s Ruby recovers and Future-Ruby says that she'll hold her off as long as she can. Ash and Kelly run out with the Book, and Future-Ruby shoots 80s Ruby without much luck.

Ash and Kelly get to the car, but he discovers that his right hand has grown back. Kelly figures that they changed history just like they planned, and Pablo bangs on the trunk door of the Mustang. They get him out and Ash explains what they did after he died. Pablo wonders where Ruby is, and as they drive off Ash explains that their Ruby didn't make it. Kelly points out that they need to get back to the future without Ruby's help, and Ash tells Pablo to read the time-travel passage. However, he says that he doesn't want to, grows a claw, and rips off his face to reveal that he's Baal.

Ash brakes the Mustang to a halt, and Baal knocks Kelly out. 80s rips the car door off, tosses in Future-Ruby's severed head, and knocks Ash out.

When Ash wakes up, he's in the cabin and the Children are crawling on the ceiling. Kelly is with him, and they see 80s Ruby creating more Children. Baal is with her, and explains that he's recreating the family Ash destroyed. Ash asks where Pablo is, and Baal tells him that he's dead. He managed to take over Pablo's dead body, and convinced Ash to go back in time to revive Pablo's body.

Ash figures that he can fight Baal in a fair fight. 80s Ruby tells Baal to ignore him, and Baal wonders what Ash hopes to achieve. Ash says that if he wins, Baal and Ruby go to the underworld with the Children and Pablo is resurrected. 80s Ruby wants Apocalypse and her Children to eat Kelly, and Baal tells 80s Ruby to get the Book. He then cuts Ash's hand and agrees to his terms. He cuts his own hand and they bond over the Book, and Ruby seals the bargain with a spell.

Baal and Ash square off, while a disgusted 80s Ruby complains about their vanity. She then opens the Book to alter the deal. Kelly realizes that she's set the Dagger aside.

Ash pins Baal down and punches him, but Baal bites his hand.

80s Ruby tells Kelly that she can be a leader rather than a follower, and if she joins with 80s Ruby then she'll have powers she can't imagine. Kelly tries to grab the Dagger, but one a Child grabs her and throws her away.

As Ash prepares to deliver the final blow, Baal turns into Chet. When Ash hesitates, "Chet" smashes him into a piano, trapping him and playing the keys on Ash's face. He then grabs Ash's right arm and cuts off his hand with Ash's chainsaw. The hand leaps up and crawls away, giving Ash and Chet-Baal the finger. Chet-Baal kicks Ash through a floor and takes on Cheryl's appearance.

The Children pull Kelly up to the ceiling and then drop her, and *0s Ruby summons the Dagger and the Book to her hand.

As Ash bandages his hand, Cheryl-Baal advances on Ash with the chainsaw. Ash hides in the bathroom but Cheryl-Baal pops up and then calls to Ash through the door... using Brock's voice. Ash opens the door and finds his father there. He insists that he's Brock and tells Ash that it's vital that he knows the truth now that he's ready. Ash punches him in the stomach and slams him into the wall, then drowns him in the tub.

Once Brock is dead, Baal steps out and says that he was never going to honor the deal. Brock's body disappears, leaving the chainsaw behind. Ash grabs it and attacks, and Baal parries with his own chainsaw. The two fight and Baal manages to disarm Ash. He beats him and sends him flying into the living room. Ash looks over at Kelly and says that he failed everyone.

Baal says that the Prophesied One will die at his hands and humanity will worship evil once more. As he prepares to kill Ash, Ash admits that Baal won. However, before he dies he wants to know one thing. Ash looks over at 80s Ruby and asks what she was like in the sack, and then grabs Baal's hand and jams his claw into own stomach.

80s Ruby and the Children scream in agony and clutch at their stomachs, and Ash rips the claw up through Baal's body, cutting his skin in half. The Book leaps out of 80s Ruby's hands as the skin falls off of Baal as he's forced to honor the deal. The cabin tears itself apart and hellfire emerges out of the floorboards. Ash grabs Kelly and takes her out, and get clear as the cabin and its contents are pulled down to Hell. Pablo pulls himself out of the ashes, gasping for breath, and Ash and Kelly run forward to greet him. Ash punches Pablo to be sure in case that it's Baal, and then they hug.

Later in Elk Grove in the present, the townspeople celebrate Ash's victory in 1982. The mayor welcomes Ash, who is sitting with Linda. Ash sees Brock, Cheryl, and Chet as ghosts in the back of the crowd, cheering him as well, and Brock nods in approval. Taking the microphone, Ash makes a speech about how they kicked him out for killing his friends and family. He assures them that he's a bad-ass killer and they were all assholes. However, they're all past that and Ash insists that he loves the town. Now he's going to move back for good and take out whatever evil he finds, and everyone cheers.

Brock gives Ash the thumbs up and disappears, and Ash points out to Linda that everything is perfect. She tells him that he's done his part and now he can live a normal life, doing whatever he wants. They kiss and Pablo and Kelly come up as the townspeople applauds. In the back of the crowd, 80s Ruby walks away as Ash cheers in triumph.

Written by Gadfly on Dec 11, 2016