Binghamton and Carpenter escort Tinker and Virgil with a top secret package marching across the base. They unlock a secure warehouse to put the package inside and Binghamton orders them out. Carpenter then removes the cover to reveal a crate of 1934 vintage champagne. The commander figures that they can use it for his party when he's promoted, and Carpenter wonders how he's going to keep it a secret from McHale. Binghamton figures that they already know about it, but the warehouse is impenetrable. Once Binghamton and Carpenter leave, the crew lifts up a floorboard, grab the champagne, and leave.
The crew returns to the island and show McHale what they've acquired. McHale says that they're going back where it came from because they're not going to risk their necks for champagne. Fuji says that it's his first anniversary since he won his letters. He says that he's been cooking a big lobster dinner for the party, and McHale reluctantly gives in.
Binghamton and Carpenter go to the warehouse and Binghamton says that he's going to use it to woo the new nurse. They go in and discover the champagne is missing, and Binghamton is sure McHale took it. He promises to find out how they got in, jumps up and down in frustration, and goes through the loose floorboard into the tunnel below.
Later at the island, the crew prepare the main room for the party. McHale says that Binghamton wants them to do a recon check on a local island, and tells them that they should get moving so they'll be back in time for the party. Once they leave, Binghamton and Carpenter arrive on the gig with Marines, and Binghamton tells Carpenter to find his champagne now that the crew is out on his phony mission. They find the party decoration, and as they search the place Carpenter spots Fiji by the lagoon diving for lobsters. They figure that it's an invasion and the Marines grab him as Fuji comes in. Fuji feigns not speaking English and Carpenter says that McHale speaks Japanese. Binghamton tells Carpenter to call McHale back in and they'll interrogate Fuji at the base.
Willy gives McHale Binghamton's message and they realize that he has Fuji. When they get back, McHale and Parker go to the brig and Binghamton shows them his captive. McHale dismisses Fuji as a sawed-off teenager, but Binghamton doesn't believe it and tells McHale to get Fuji to confess. Once they talk, McHale says that Fuji is a simple fisherman that comes from a community 200 miles north of the base. He claims that Fuji was caught in a typhoon and swam to their island, and warns Binghamton to put Fuji in a canoe and send him back to his village rather than risk embarrassment. Binghamton refuses and Carpenter says that a transport should be heading to Comfleet in three hours.
Later, the crew sneak up to the brig and discover that Binghamton has doubled the guard. Gruber warns that they can't dig a tunnel like they did to get the champagne, and McHale gets an idea. He figures that they can get Binghamton to stop the flight if they convince Binghamton and the Marines that the war is over. If the Marines are distracted celebrating then they can get in and fear Fuji.
On the 73, Willy tunes in the right radio frequency and McHale tells everyone to start on his signal. On cue, the crew start shooting into the air. When other sailors hear the commotion, Gruber tells them that it just came in over the radio that the war is over. McHale runs into Binghamton's office and tells him that the Japanese have surrendered. They turn on the radio and Tinker announces that Parker--posing as FDR--says that the war is over. Parker than poses as a BBC radio announcer and says the same thing.
Gruber runs into the radio room wearing a zoot suit and says that he's heading off to Brooklyn. Parker continues impersonating a French announcer, and McHale serves Binghamton his own champagne and says that they were saving it for him until the end of the war. When Binghamton realizes that McHale is giving him his champagne back, he figures that McHale is telling the truth.
McHale tells Binghamton to announce the news to the rest of the base. Binghamton says that the war is over, and Gruber gives the Marines guarding Fuji champagne and invites them to party. Once they leave, Happy and Virgil sneak in and free Fuji. Parker and Tinker continue faking the broadcast, with Parker pretending to be the Emperor.
As a drunken Binghamton and Carpenter join the conga line, Gruber tells McHale that Fuji is safe. McHale tells him to taper off the celebration before it gets too far out of hand. Meanwhile, Carpenter starts insulting Binghamton after two years of putting up with him, and shoves him off the dock. McHale comes over and sees Admiral Rogers arriving. As he and Gruber pull Binghamton out, Binghamton pulls Carpenter in and Rogers comes over to demand an explanation. Binghamton insults Rogers and rips off his stripes, saying that he doesn't need them because the war is over. He suggests that Roger listen to the radio on the 73, and they go aboard as Gruber warns McHale that parker is still in the radio room.
Parker and Tinker are doing a fake broadcast from Scotland, complete with bagpipes, when Binghamton and Rogers come in. Rogers demands an explanation, and McHale comes in and offers to explain. They go up on deck and Rogers prepares to court-martial McHale. A Japanese Super-PT boat pulls into the lagoon and the crew, having heard the broadcast, are eager to surrender. McHale quickly claims he planned the entire thing to get the Super Pt, and Rogers is duly impressed. He admits that it's unorthodox but congratulates McHale on his quick thinking. Binghamton asks about his prisoner, and Rogers says that he'll deal with Binghamton later and promises to demote him to Seaman.
Later, the crew celebrate Fuji's anniversary. McHale says that the champagne went to a good cause, just as Gruber arrives with 10-year-old Scotch. He says that he took it from a supply boat that docked, and McHale refuses to let him take it back. With that he starts tossing out the bottles.
Written by Gadfly on Dec 22, 2016