Fear of Unfamiliar Toilets (Novuslatrinaphobia)

Figaro's toilet fails, leaving him no choice but to find an alternative.
The obvious destination is the garden outhouse, but years of use by malodourous Boris has left it a festering biohazard. Figaro must continue to look for a discreet place to relieve himself. Unfortunately, a freakish lack of privacy ruins every attempt so Figaro is forced to reconsider the outdoor loo. Not to be deterred, and fighting hard against the movements in his tummy, Figaro arms himself with enough bleach to scrub away even the most revolting of stains.
Will that be enough for Figaro to get to the loo in time?