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Wet Hot American Bummer Recap

At a summer camp, Judy and Tony are on a blanket by the lake. A swamp creature emerges from the water and charges at them... and Sara pauses the video on the movie. Ava looks up the film on the Internet and they read about how the film is based on real-life tragic events that occurred at Camp Ogawa in Maine on the summer of 1995. Gideon calls Sara and says that it's detected new magical events involving the disappearance of children at Ogawa. Sara prepares to head out, and invites Ava to come with her insisting that Ava will love it. She figures that it will be a great way for them to spend more time together.

Ava and Sara board Waverider, and Ava confirm that Nate and Gary are handling the Time Bureau. Sara shows Ava the imprisoned Charlie, and Tala is standing watch. She explains that Charlie in Amaya's form is a shapeshifter, and Charlie swears at them. Ava wonders why Charlie is there, and assumes that they're keeping her there to get information on the extradimensional where she and the other magical fugitives were imprisoned.

The women go to the bridge where Ray and Constantine are waiting. Sara explains where they're going and Ava suggests that they're looking for a swamp monster. Ray remembers how he and Nate used to buddy up, and Sara suggests that Constantine and Ray team up.

Waverider arrives in 1995 and the four teammates dress up as camp counselors. The director, Paula Cooper, greets them and says that her right-hand man, Chad Stephens, will show them around. Chad comes over and shows them around. Constantine and Ava work out strategy, and Chad says that Ogawa is a miserable place and Paula runs it like a POW camp... and then says that he's joking. Chad bonds with Ray over Ray's lanyards, and Sara what special skills she has. She says that she knows martial arts, and clarifies that she likes knives and swords.

Once they settle in, Ray introduces himself and Constantine to the boys in their cabin. Constantine drinks from a flask and wanders off, and Ray asks who is excited to learn tracking. Sara and Ava go to their cabin and introduce themselves to the girls, and Ava complains when Sara bonds with the girls. Ava suggests that they go back to the fun and games after they capture the creature, and tells the girls to walk to their beds when she blows her whistle. A lot.

Constantine lies down a circle of salt and a boy comes up behind him. He wonders what Constantine is doing, and Constantine says that he's putting down a barrier against vicious monsters.

That night, Ava and Sara go out on the porch and Sara says that they're ruining camp for the kids. She talks about the year she went to summer camp, and figures that the monster won't get into the camp that night. Meanwhile, a girl, Lenise, sneaks out and goes into the woods, following a string. A boy camper, Zack, finds her and asks what she wants to do. As they close their eyes to kiss, something grabs Zack and yanks him into the woods and then comes at Lenise.

The next morning, the team confirms that Zack and Lenise are missing. Constantine says that the children snuck out and broke his barrier, and Ray suggests that they notify Paula. Paula figure that the kids will be fine and explains that it happens every year. She tells them to do some counselling and leaves, and Sara figure that one of the kids knows where Zack and Lenise are.

Ray has the boys in their cabin form a circle of trust. An exasperated Constantine talks to Ray privately and says that he'll show him how it's done. He offers to hypnotize a volunteer and the boys leap at the chance.

Sara talks to Lenise's friend Alexis about where Alexis might have gone. Ava comes in and has everyone line up at their beds. She tells Sara that her way will be quicker.

Constantine hypnotizes a boy and asks him where Zack went. The boy doesn't know anything useful.

A girl, Kiana, complains that the ice cream social starts in five minutes. Ava tells her to start talking or she's going to miss it.

Another hypnotized boy says that Zack said that he was going to make it to first base with a girl.

Alexis suggests that Ava could use a makeover.

When Charlie knocks herself out against the force field, Zari goes to check on her. Charlie is playing possum, knocks Zari into the force field, and activates it around Zari. Zari says that she found her place and Charlie could as well, but Charlie doesn't care and runs out.

Constantine asks Sara how many girls that Ava has made cry. Sara suggests that she could get through to the girls if she was a 12-year-old camper, and Constantine gets an idea.

Charlie runs through Waverider and Mick corners her. He takes her back to her cage and Charlie says that they're more alike than they think. She asks how sleeps at night hanging out with the Legends, and Mick tells her that he uses alcohol.

Ava tells Sara that the girls are stonewalling them. A girl comes over and tells Ava that she'll say what's really going on, and the lake beast won't stop until someone stops it. The girl says that years ago, campers played a prank on a boy and he drowned, and every year he returns to get his revenge. She tells Ava that the only way to get the lake beast to appear is to go to the dock and say his name three times.

That night, Ava goes to the dock, while Ray, Constantine, and Sara watch from the woods. Ava says "Lake Beast" three times, and a moss-encrusted mockery finally arises from the lake. It's a dummy, and the girls yank a rope knocking Ava into the water. The girls run off as the others run down to help Ava out of the water.

The next morning, the team confirms that two more campers have gone missing. Ray and Constantine go into the woods to look for the kids while Ava and Sara stand guard. Chad comes over and tells the kids to behave or they'll be banned from the jamboree. Sara suggests to Ava that they should get into the girls' clique, and explains that Constantine gave them a potion that would temporally turn them into kids. Ava points out that she's never been a kid and all of her childhood memories are fake, and walks off.

Ray and Constantine check the woods, and Ray keeps yammering around. Constantine finally says that he needs silence, throws away Ray's compass, and tells him that it's too dangerous for Ray. Ray insists that he's no stranger to magic, but Constantine knows that he let Nora go. As they argue, Ray trips over shed skin. Constantine has a magic book with information about magical creatures.

Mick shares his hooch with Charlie, who says that inside her cage there were magical creatures fighting each other all of the time. She insists that she'll never go back, and Mick agrees.

Sara finds Ava making an "I'm sorry" bracelet for Sara. Sara apologizes for not remembering that Ava was created, and Ava admits that she took the bracelet from Alexis. Ray calls and says that they found a skin suit and it belongs to a shtriga: a vampiric witch that feeds on the life force of children. The shtriga feeds over a course of days, and Sara tells them to find the kids while she and Ava protect the girls. Sara tells Ava that the best way to protect the girls is to become their age, and promises that she'll show Ava the ropes if necessary.

That night, Ava and Sara drink the potion and lights surround them. Chad comes in and discovers two 12-year-old girls. They go to the girls' cabin and say that they got kicked out of another cabin. Young Ava claims that she was reading after lights off, and Young Sara says that Ava was writing to her boyfriend in France. The girls make fun of the adult Ava and Sara, and Ava reluctantly joins in.

Charlie explains that she shapeshifted into something to keep monsters off her back. Mick talks about how he and his old partner spent time in supermax working as a team, and tells Charlie that she has to start trusting sometime.

Sara calls Constantine, who admits that he didn't know if the potion would work. He suggests that they use cheyenne pepper because the witches hate the stuff, and Sara takes Ava off to find some. Ray and Constantine continue their search and find a scrap of clothing. Constantine casts a spell to track the child, turning the scrap into a will o' the wisp. As they follow it, Constantine advises Ray to stay away from Nora because she's wrestled with demons. When Ray points out that Constantine has wrestled with demons and he's a member of the team, Constantine says that he had a friend like Ray and he came to a bad end. He warns Ray that people like him and Nora are hell for people like Ray.

Ava and Sara start a game of Truth and Dare, and Sara has the girls dare to break into the kitchen and sneak something out. Ava immediately heads for the mess hall.

The will o' the wisp leads Constantine and Ray to an abandoned cabin.

Ava comes back and says that she ran into some trouble, and brings in two buckets of ice cream. The girls eat the ice cream, and Ava gives Sara the cayenne pepper she took.

Ray and Constantine enter the cabin and find the four missing campers in cages. Constantine prepares a spell to draw their life force back.

The girls say that camp has been rough, and admit that they're worried about Lenise and the other girl, Meredith. Every summer the girls meet up with guys they like, and follow a string to the meeting spot. Ava and Sara follow the string out and Paula cuts the string with a pair of hedge trimmers. Sara knocks her out.

Zari and Mick tell Charlie that the others are dealing with a shtriga. Charlie says that she knows about it and says that they're looking one is a good-looking bloke rather than an old crone. Mick releases Charlie, and Zari tells Ava and Sara who they're looking for.

Constantine begins the spell.

Chad tells the two girls to come with him whether they like it or not. He grabs Sara and knocks down Ava, and the two girls attack him. Chad starts draining Ava's life force, and Sara knocks him away.

Ray performs the incantation with Constantine.

Chad screams in pain as the life force drains out of him and back to the campers. He reverts to his demonic form, and the two girls attack him. they knock him back and he disappears into the forest, and then pushes them over. Working together, Sara grabs the trimmers, jumps into the air with a boost from Ava, and drives the trimmers into Chad, killing him.

The campers don't wake up, and Constantine insists that he won't lose another kid. He casts a spell on one boy, Randall, transferring some of his life force to the boy and bringing him back to life before collapsing. Ray goes to him and Constantine wakes up and asks for a light. The other boys arrive following Ray's tracking raining and take Constantine and the campers back.

Ava thanks Sara for giving her real childhood memories, and as they kiss the spell ends and they revert to their adult selves.

When the team returns to Waverider, Sara notices that Charlie is gone. Mick says that he let Charlie go, just as Charlie comes in. Sara thanks her for the shtriga tip, and Charlie figures that they need her help as long as they never take her to the cage.

Later in the medbay, Gideon tells Ray and Sara that Constantine's body is rejecting its treatments. Sara has Gideon give Constantine the good stuff, and Sara figure that maybe magic can save her. Ray says that knows someone but isn't sure how to find her.

Nora is making soup at a ren fair and not doing a very good job of it.

Written by Gadfly on Nov 13, 2018

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