Ferret Royale Recap

Jay and Danny lead an assault on a home and knock at the door, calling to the owner Ian Anderson. He opens the door just as the police barge in, and they search the house. They find man drug manufacturers and abduction victims, but not what they’re looking for. Jay finally notices a trap door beneath a carpet and goes opens it. Inside is what they’re looking for: a ferret. They arrest Anderson for having a pet ferret illegally in the state of California, and lead him away.

At the station, Jay tells Angie that she was right about Anderson. She figures that they have to find the illegal ferret smuggling ring and goes into the interrogation room with Jay. They sweat him for the name of his supplier, and as he prepares to tell them someone shoots an arrow in his back. Pritkin calls Jay and Angie out to where Laurie Partridge, a Special Agent with Fish & Game, Rodent Division, is waiting. She knows Angie and vice versa, and is there to pick up the ferret. Laurie explains that she and Angie were roommates at the academy. Angie points out that they were up for the same game at F&G but Laurie threw her under the bus. Pritkin has no choice but to let Laurie take the ferret, and Laurie dismisses the LAPD as a bunch of animals. As she goes, Monica “accidentally” bumps into her and takes the ferret, substituting a box of Pop Tarts, putting on lipstick, and kissing an officer

At the morgue, Angie, Jay, and Monica meet with Edelweiss. He suggests that they cut open the ferret, find out what it ate, and determine where it’s been. Jay objects, insisting that it’s a human being, so Edelweiss does an ultrasound. There are traces of apple, but it doesn’t prove helpful. The ferret has their badge, handcuffs, and glasses, and Edelweiss confirms that it’s pregnant. He says that it would be highly valuable on the black market. The ferret has eaten a cufflink with the initials FB.

Angie and Jay go the office of Helmut Frontbut, who runs an animal rights charity and lives up to his name. He insists that he loves ferrets and knows anything about illegal animal trafficking. Helmut points out that he’s hosting a charity poker tournament that night for exactly $198,350. It has a $50,000 buy0-in, and anyone is welcome who can afford it. Helmut claims he has no idea how his cufflink ended up in the stomach of an illegal ferret.

Back at the station, Angie figures that they need to get into the tournament. Laurie confronts them and reveals that she recovered the ferret. She’s going to take down Helmut, and Angie insists that they’re getting that money. They talk to Pritkin and Jay insists that there’s no chance of losing since he’s never lost at poker. Pritkin points out that they’d have to shut down the police for a day to get $50,000, and immediately cuts the power to give it a try. Rioting starts up until he turns the power back on, and everyone goes back to work. However, Pritkin says that there is one place that they could get the $50,000. He reaches up to the swear jar but they discover that they’re a dollar short until Angie swears.

At the poker tournament, Jay sits down across from Helmut and hands over the $50,000. Laurie is there and refuses to leave. Jay says that he plays the players, and goes all in. Everyone else folds except Helmut, who goes all=-in as well. He has a pair of kings and the dealer deals him five more kings for a winning hand. Jay and Angie go to the bar, and Angie figures that she knows how to get some more money. She calls Danny, who gets out the swear jar and starts swearing.

Angie realizes that it will take too long, and Laurie comes over and offers to help Angie buy back in. She says that it took them six years to get close to Helmut, and it only took Angie one day. Angie wonders why she hates her, and Laurie admits that she was the best at everything until she got to the academy and was overshadowed by Angie. They agree to both be the best, and Laurie hands over the money.

Back at the table, Angie continues playing and everyone finally goes out except for Helmut. She bets $10,000 and Helmut raises her $40,000. After a moment, Angie goes all-in and Helmut calls her. She has two pair, and Helmut reveals a full house. However, Angie reveals that she has two pair of two pairs. Helmut grabs Angie’s guns and threatens to shoot her if her fellow agents don’t lower their guns. Once they do, Helmet boasts that he will continue smuggling illegal ferrets into California. Jay grabs a discarded gun and shoots, and they realize that the F&G people are using tranq guns. Everyone darts everyone else and collapses.

Later at the station, Laurie congratulates Angie and offers to put in a word for her at F&G. Angie says that she’s good there, and Laurie starts to kiss her. When Angie stops her, she apologizes for misreading the situation and tries again... and again.

Written by Gadfly on Jul 9, 2016