The crew makes up Parker as General Smythe-Pelley, figuring that they can sell photo opportunities with him to the sailors at the base. McHale comes in and asks what's going on, and Gruber explains about their plan. Binghamton and Carpenter arrive and spot Parker, and quickly figure out he's not the general. McHale claims that Parker was giving the crew a course in identification of uniforms, but Binghamton cancels their leave and departs.
The real Smythe-Pelly arrives at Taratupa due to an aircraft emergency, and stops by Binghamton's office. Binghamton bumps into him and assumes that he's Parker. He breaks his swagger stick and monocle and goes into his office, and Smythe-Pelly says that if Parker really looks so much like him, they'll be calling on him.
Later, ComFleet calls McHale and Parker in. Captain Harlow explains that Allied High Command has planned a major strike. He has Parker put on Smythe-Pelly's beret, monocle, and mustache, The real general comes in, and he and Parker stare at each other. Smythe-Pelly says that the stakes are ten thousand lives at the Battle of Iroshima. The Japanese know that the general is amounting his next invasion in the area, and Parker will go to Noumea and distract the Japanese agents while Smythe-Pelly leads the invasion at Iroshima. McHale will stay with Parker as his "American liaison," and realizes that Parker will need a lot of help.
Parker arrives at Noumea posing as Smythe-Pelly and the crowds cheer him. The mayor presents him with the key to the city and Renee presents him with flowers from the ladies of Noumea. Parker says that how long he'll be there is top secret, and McHale quickly excuses the two of them. The head agent, Henri, calls Renee over afterward and she assures Henri that she can handle the general.
Parker and McHale go to their room and McHale leaves to check the layout. Renee comes in and starts vamping Parker, claiming that she's worshipped him from afar for years. She kisses him and is disappointed in the kiss of "the great lover," and Parker blames it on battle fatigue. He kisses her with more fervor, leaving his fake mustache on her lip, and kisses her again to get it back. Parker tries to excuse himself and Renee tries to get information about how long he'll be on Noumea, just as McHale comes in. He quickly ushers Renee out and tells Parker to stay away from her.
McHale and Parker go to the parade grounds to watch the local air show. Renee approaches them as they leave, and McHale quickly escorts Parker away. After the inspection, they go back to the hotel with six hours until midnight and the invasion begins. Renee is waiting but McHale says that they have to get ready for the mayor's reception. After they go inside, Renee meets Henri and tells him that McHale is keeping her away. Henri says that since they can't question Parker, they're going to liquidate him.
Later, Parker and McHale come out and Henri tries to run him down. McHale shoves Parker out of the way just in time and figures it for an assassination attempt. Binghamton arrives in a cab and accuses McHale of deserting. He says that the 73 crew is there as well, and sees Parker. Binghamton rants at him and Renee drops a flowerpot on Parker... and hits Binghamton. McHale pretends that Binghamton has passed out drunk and has the staff take Binghamton inside, and tells Parker that the crew will attend the reception with them to provide protection.
That night at the reception, the crew arrives with Gruber and Tinker posing as undercover British Secret Service agents. Christy, Willy, Happy, and Virgil pose as foreign dignitaries.
In the lobby, Henri hides behind a screen and kill Parker when she brings him out.
Binghamton walks in and McHale realizes that he'll blow everything. He sends Parker to hide out in the lobby, and Parker bumps into Renee. Henry tries to stab him and misses. Meanwhile, Binghamton recognizes the crew despite their disguises, and Gruber claims that Binghamton is an international jewel thief. McHale calls for the police and whispers to Binghamton that he'll explain later.
In the lobby, Parker keeps peering into the hall and Henri keeps missing. Parker finally notices and runs upstairs.
The crew shoves Binghamton in a closet.
Parker runs out onto the balcony and tries to cross to the next building on a drain pipe. The crew hears Parker yelling and split up to find him. Parker and Tinker arrive and attack Henri, and the others roll a hay wagon under Parker just in time as he loses his grip. McHale knocks out Henri just as the clock strikes midnight, and Parker passes out.
Later back at Taratupa, Smythe-Pelly and Harlow arrive at Binghamton's office. Binghamton bumps into the general and assumes that he's Parker and rips off his medals... just as McHale and Parker arrive. McHale advises Binghamton to start apologizing, and Binghamton sees Parker.
Written by Gadfly on Mar 10, 2017