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The Austere Academy: Part Two Recap

Olaf, disguised as Coach Genghis, rides the horse as Carmelita leads the school in a pep cheer.

Lemony talks about how school spirit refers to the belief that one school is better than another.

Once Olaf finishes, Nero tells everyone to settle down. Olaf talks about how a woman came to him for help losing wait. He says that he didn't tell her to settle down, but to stand up and actualize. Olaf looks at the Baudelaires and says that she died in a mysterious fire. Nero is shocked that Olaf is talking about a woman dying, but Olaf ignores him and continues on. Klaus and Violet grab a discarded newspaper with a front-page story about Olaf's criminal acts, and ask everyone to listen. They say that Olaf is an imposter, and Carmelita says that they're lying. Olivia speaks up in the Baudelaires' defense, and Violet tries to remove Olaf's turban to reveal his one eyebrow. He refuses, insisting that he has two eyebrows, and insists that he doesn't have a tattoo of an eye on his ankle. Olaf refuses to take off his shoe and sock because it's gross.

Nero has his computer system brought out and asks Olaf to stand in front of it. Olaf tries to stall, but the computer scans him and says that Olaf isn't Olaf. He asks the students how many people want to hear orphans make tiresome accusations, and Isadora and Duncan side with the Baudelaires. None of the students do, and Olaf has everyone get to their feet and performing jumping jacks. He runs out of breath after two jacks, and says that he's developed special orphan running exercises. Olivia stands up with the Quagmires, and Olaf chooses the Baudelaires to run on the exercise track every night. Once the student leave, Violet tells Olaf that they'll stop him. He points out that they don't have the power to stop him, and says that he'll see them at sundown.

Back at their shack, the Baudelaires wonder how Olaf will get their fortune if he's a gym teacher. Isadora and Duncan arrive and say that they'll help, and suggest that they run away. When the Quagmires see the photo of the families from the lumber mill, the Quagmires confirm that their parents are in the photo with the Baudelaire parents. Carmelita arrives and gives them a singing message to go to the exercise track.

In the kitchen freezer, Larry moves to stay warm and recites Jack London. Jacques Snicket breaks down the door and asks if someone called for a taxi.

Olaf and Nero are waiting for the Baudelaires at the track, and Olaf recites a story about three wealthy children coming to him asking for help, and he told them to put on expensive running shoes and rag a bucket of luminous paint around until they've made a luminous circle on the ground. Nero doesn't understand, and Olaf sends him to resin his bow.

Jacques takes the frozen Larry out of the freezer, and Carmelita comes in and confronts them. She's surprised when Jacques knows her, and he says that her organization has made note of her. Larry is surprised that Jacques stood up for him, and Carmelita is shocked speechless when Jacques tells her that it takes one to know one.

The Quagmires go to the library and tell Olivia if she found the book. Olivia admits that she hasn't found in the book in their system or any other. Nero comes in and tells Olivia that the library is closed by order of Olaf. The vice principal insists that it's only temporary until he gets his orphan-exercising program going.

The Baudelaires run in circles under Olaf's direction. The hook-handed man brings Olaf some coffee to stay awake and make the Baudelaires run all night.

Larry calls Jacquelyn and says that Olaf is on to him. Jacquelyn asks if he delivered the book to the Baudelaires, and Larry admits that he has to go back. Poe calls for Jacquelyn, and Jacques tells Jacquelyn that he will go back to Prufrock after finding Larry medical treatment.

Lemony says that the night would be a dark day for everyone.

The next day, the exhausted Baudelaires sleep through their classes and secretarial duties. At lunch, the Baudelaires tell the Quagmires that they still don't know Olaf's plan for making them run. Carmelita delivers a message to the Baudelaires that Nero wants to see them. Olivia is now serving lunch.

In Nero's office, Nero tells the Baudelaires that they're failing in their classes and at running in circles. Olaf tells them a story about home schooling, and Nero says that the teachers will give Violet and Klaus comprehensive verbal examinations in front of their classes, and Sunny will get a job evaluation. If they fail then they'll be expelled. Olaf also wants them to run laps, and Nero says that they'll have to attend his violin recital.

In the shack, Violet tells her siblings and the Quagmires that she has an idea. They break into the kitchen and the Quagmires stand watch while the Baudelaires make a dummy out of flour and rubber gloves. They hide when Carmelita comes in to sniff cake. Once she's done, she runs out and Sunny makes fake glasses out of tongs while the others stuff bags with flower. The Baudelaires worry that they'll never see the Quagmires again, and the Quagmires tell the Baudelaires to go first. Duncan puts on the fake glasses to disguise himself as Klaus, and Isadora makes up her hair to look like Violet. Klaus gives Isadora his half of the spyglasses, and she kisses him on the cheek for luck.

Jacques drives back to Prufrock in his taxi.

The disguised Quagmires arrive at the exercise track with a dummy of Sunny, while Olaf's people tell him what happened to Larry. In the shack, the Baudelaires go over their exams and Sunny removes staples from papers.

The Quagmires continue running in circles, making a big luminous 0. The string that their towing the dummy with breaks and comes to a halt, and Olaf notices. The Quagmires realize what happened, and Olaf goes over to give the "baby" a kick. It sprays flour into his face, and the Quagmires run to the closed library. Olaf goes looking for them and searches the library, but before he can find them, the hook-handed man calls him away. His boss tells him to guard the library and leaves. The Quagmires realize that they can't warn the Baudelaires, and see the book on a shelf. They find a picture of the spyglass and Isadora assembles it so that it shines a light. The hook-handed man sees the light, while the Quagmires go through the book and find information about the fire and VFD.

The exhausted Baudelaires doze off, and crabs crawl over their feet. He finds the Quagmires as they find a reference in the book to a sugar bowl.

The next morning, Poe arrives at Prufrock and runs across Olaf. He has bags of candy for Nero since the Baudelaires have missed his recitals. Carmelita comes out and demands a bag of candy, and Poe hands her one and then Olaf quickly leads him off before he can discover the Baudelaires are in a shack. Meanwhile, Carmelita wakes up the Baudelaires and tells them that the tests are ready to begin.

Carmelita takes the Baudelaires to the school auditorium, and Poe sees them. He says that he brought the papers for their home-schooling, and doesn't believe that the coach is Olaf. Nero comes in and tells Poe that children will say anything to excuse their bad grades. Olaf comes in and passes the computer scan due to his disguise.

Poe takes a seat and Olaf says that Prufrock has a new sense of unity and spirit sine they're planning to flunk the Baudelaires out. Bass and Remora come out and Olaf has them test the Baudelaires. The Baudelaires pass the teachers' questions and Sunny passes Nero's job evaluation. Olivia excuses herself and discovers that someone has torn up the library. The secret organization book is lying on the floor.

Lemony tells the viewers to look away, saying that thing can get much worse.

Olivia picks up the book and takes it to the auditorium.

Remora and Bass the Baudelaires with high marks, and Nero concedes that Sunny is a fantastic administrative assistant. However, Carmelita tells them that they're not adorable enough to pass. Nero overrides her and tells Poe that the Baudelaires will get to stay through the trimester. Olaf interrupts to say that he hasn't given his test yet, and says that he knows from the experience of a young man who was expelled for the same reason. He says that he'll take Sunny on in arm-wrestling, and Violet dares him to wrestle them to show that he's a gym teacher. Klaus and Violet arm-wrestle Olaf, and Olaf starts to win until the Baudelaires fight back. Sunny unties Olaf's shoe and then pulls him over. His shoe goes flying into the air, and the tattoo on his ankle is revealed. Poe realizes who Olaf if, and Olaf runs out to the car that the hook-handed man has waiting.

The Baudelaires grab Olaf's turban and unwind it, revealing his unibrow. Dizzy, he knocks over the shack and then runs to the car. Olaf and the gang drive off, with the Quagmires in the back trying to yell what they found. Isadora drops Klaus' half of the spyglass, and Klaus finds it as the car drives away.

Written by Gadfly on May 6, 2018

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