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The Saphrax Protocol Recap

In the Ventech Tower, a Guild blackout team teleport inside and prepare to look for Rusty. Rusty walks in and wonders what's going on. They take him to the Guild satellite HQ, and Watch and Wade drug him unconscious. The team leader returns, and Watch and Wade tell them to bring Brock back.

The Council meets and after arguing about Phage's teleport accident, settle down to business. The candidates are hoodwinked in the Ritual Space, and Girlfriend says that it's an important Tanning.

A mustached Hank walks through the wintry landscape of Hoth, and razor-teethed dolls move in on him. Action Man appears dressed as a Wookie, and tells Hank to stay perfectly still. he admits that he never thought of kicking them over. Hank kicks through the dolls and Action Man explains that they're dead and Purgatory is the movie Barbarella.

The team leader returns and finds the team tied up. Brock grabs him by the throat and asks what's going on. The leader fially signals that there are 15 men left, and Brock helpfully punctures his throat so that he can breathe since Brock broke his windpipe.

The Council begins the ritual, and Phantom Limb talks of Saphax Tervingian, the first man to turn a grudge into a career and became the first villain. Monarch and 21 arrive and Monarch proclaims that he has achieved the rank of a Level Ten villain. They begin the trials by having Monarch find the beast inside of a log to retrieve the stone. Monarch puts his hand inside and digs through the beast's waste, and Dr. Z talks about how they wouldn't keep a beast around that bites.

Another blackout member moves through the tower, and Brock hides I a suit of samurai armor and then jumps on him, putting a katana through his head. He then gets on the loudspeaker and thanks them for accepting their suicide mission. Brock says that he's been bored and will enjoy killing the blackout team. He seals the windows and thanks the blackout team for their mission, and discovers that Hatred took the gun hidden beneath the console.

hatred goes to the ICU and tries to talk his way past the night nurse, Cindy Marie Abrams. She tells him to take a seat and wait. Inside, Dean reads a letter to the comatose Hank apologizing for everything that he's done wrong between them.

In Purgatory, Action Man explains that Hank is in his Purgatory. Hank points out that Action Man had a stroke and is in a coma, and the last thing he remembers is going out to look for his girlfriend. Action Man tells Hank that he hasn't done anything with his life, and now he's obsessing about his first love. A wampa appears ahead of them.

Brock advances on a team member, who shoots him. Brock stands back up and the member kills himself with a cyanide capsule before Brock can hurt him.

Watch and Wade are scanning the unconscious Rusty and trying to decipher the results. The dead member is teleported back up, but Watch and Wade are too busy confirming that according to the blood analyzer, Rusty and Monarch are related.

As Monarch conducts the next trial with a magic chicken, Girlfriend tells him that she's proud of him. 21 as the first Henchman comes out and makes Girlfriend look so he can kill her. He then says that he has earned the rank of a Level Ten Henchman, and Phantom Limb says that he has earned a Level Four Villain. Monarch is less than thrilled that the party isn't for him.

Dean tells the comatose Hank everything that he's learned about their family, and is jealous that Hank doesn't care that he dresses like Batman in public.

The wampa hang Hank and Action Man up in his cave, and Hank tries to work out when he can do when he's in the Lando Calrissian role. He tries to seduce the approaching wampa, but Phage arrives and kills it. He frees Hank and Action Man, and tells them to follow him.

Monarch plays out going to meet he Emperor, with Radical Left as the Emperor's wife. Dr. Z gives him a real sword, and the Guild reveals that the tied-up Rusty is playing the Emperor. The Guild asks Monarch what his choice is, and Girlfriend assures him that once he kills Rusty, his grudge is over and he can do whatever he wants. The Guild then leaves Monarch to deal with his enemy.

After killing most of the blackout members, Brock suggest that they take a pee break. The remaining members hastily agree.

Hatred tells the Night Nurse that he figures everyone has a price. He offers her something that he knows how.

Dean reaches the 124th reason that he's a crap brother: he slept with Selena. He says that he doesn't love her and he misses when it was just the two of them at the compound. Dean tells his brother that they came into the world together and asks him to come back to him.

Phage flies over the landscape and explains how he got there, and then takes them to the Matmos.

Hatred takes off his shirt and offers himself to the Night Nurse if she lets him see Hank. Dean comes out and the Night Nurse asks him to get Hatred to stop. The boy tells Hatred to go home and check on Rusty, and Hatred leaves.

Phage, Hank, and Action Man arrive at the Matmos and Hank figures that it's the Force. He prepares to jump into the Matmos, says goodbye to Phage and Action Man, and goes in.

Brock sends another member up through the teleporter and tells them to send back Rusty. Watch and Wade go to tell everyone Monarch and Rusty are related.

Monarch emerges from the tent and the Council notices that his sword isn't bloody. He says that the Council are dicks because they gave 21 villain status and said he could kill his arch-enemy. Monarch tells them that he's too old to start again and they have his wife and best friend. 21 refuses to be a villain without Monarch and just wants to help his best friend. The Council tell him that they completed the final trial and spared Rusty, and now Monarch and 21 are Level Ten Villains.

Watch and Wade come in and say that they have to send Rusty back. They finally reveal that Rusty and Monarch are related.

The Night Nurse wakes Dean and tells him that Hank is gone. Dean figures that he's dead, and the Night Nurse explains that Hank has left. Dean runs outside but there's no sign of Hank. Somewhere in the crowd, Hank walks off looking for himself and wearing a Halloween Batman mask.

Written by Gadfly on Oct 8, 2018

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