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Irrational Treasures Recap

In the wilderness, a man--Eric Pritkin-- climbs a mountain. He reaches the top and as the walkers go past him, he looks at the Griffin Observatory in wonder and approaches it. Finding a plaque, Eric takes to a pickaxe and breaks the plaque open. Beneath it is a metal case, and inside the case is a Loggins and Messina tape cassette. Cardin is nearby and shoots Eric with a poison dart.

The team drives to LA with Perry aboard. He tells Pritkin that that his twin brother Eric has been murdered. Angie has to leave early for a dinner, and Perry explains that Eric was looking for the treasure. Pritkin says that it's an ancient legend that drove his family into madness, and it's not worth discussing. Two thousand years ago his distant grandfather Cassius Atkins was a counsel to Julius Caesar and gave Caesar's wife a ride to the hospital. As payment he was given the location of a vault filled with the collected treasure of the Roman Empire. Pritkin insists that the secret is a myth, but his family has spent their lives looking for it. He doesn't want to waste SFD time on it. Perry gives him the tape cassette, and Pritkin says that it's the next clue as Perry leaps out of the van into traffic.

That night, the team makes camp because of plumbing problems in the van and Monica joins Pritkin at the fire. Pritkin wonders about wasting what's left of his life looking for treasure, and admits that no one wants to make him as a foster father when he has a parasite. He opens the cassette and finds a piece of paper inside. It's a dry cleaning ticket dated 1802.

The next day, the team go to America's oldest dry-cleaning shop and they find the coat belonging to the ticket number. It's Thomas Jefferson's coat, and Pritkin realizes that it's the next clue. Cardin arrives and thanks them for leading him to the next clue, and orders them to hand over the coat. Pritkin reluctantly hands it over and Cardin leaves, and Monica realizes that a map of Italy is written on the ticket in invisible ink... so they head to Rome.

Later in the catacombs of Rome, the team find a priest guide. Monica locates Caesar's tomb and the guide priest begs them not to open it. They do anyway, and find a key in the corpse's hand. The "priest" removes his disguise, revealing that he's Cardin. Cardin turns off the lights and escapes in the darkness, and Monica says that the wood the key was made from is only found in Montana.

The team find the tree in Montana and Pritkin digs up a jigsaw puzzle. Several people arrive and Pritkin shoots them, assuming that they're Cardin in disguise. When Pritkin runs out of bullets, Cardin comes out, takes the puzzle, and walks away. The team return to their base and Pritkin admits that he's obsessed like everyone else in his family. Monica points out all of the states where they've had missions, and all of them were part of the Louisiana Purchase. Angie returns from her dinner and explains what the Purchase is, and realizes that the French are trying to take their land back. Monica has the puzzle lid, and it shows the National Archives in DC... including the Purchase. If France gets the deed then they get the property, and Cardin is going to steal the deal. Pritkin vows that they're going to get it.

The Purchase is kept under state-of-the-art security measures at the National Archives. There's a celebration of the 20th Amendment going on, keeping the guards busy. Maria passes through security, Pritkin poses as a janitor dealing with contaminated shrimp, and Maria gets a thumb from a guest, sends it to Pritkin, and he sends it to AJ.

Monica accesses the computer system, and AJ enters the laser-grid protected vault. He cuts the lights with a pair of scissors and uses the fingerprint to try to access the biometric lock. It's the wrong thumb and AJ can't get in, and Cardin arrives outside the vault. AJ uses a firecracker to blow the door, and Pritkin cuts the power. Angie enters the vault through the back door, and she and AJ get the Purchase. Cardin arrives and holds them at gunpoint, and Perry and his men arrive. Perry has AJ and Angie placed under arrest, and says that Cardin has diplomatic immunity. The Vice President points out that Angie is holding the Purchase and broke into the Archives.

The team arrives and Monica kisses Perry. Pritkin and Maria train their guns on Angie and AJ, and Maria says that AJ is with them. AJ says that he's with Angie, and Angie tosses the purchase up into the air. It falls on the ground and shatters, and Angie and AJ escape in the confusion and take Cardin with them.

Written by Gadfly on Dec 31, 2018

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