Terms of Service Recap

Outside Washington DC in 2018, a young Zari is in the kitchen eating Halva as her mom tells her that it's time to go. Her pregnant mother confronts her and then says that the baby is kicking. As Zari goes to put on her shoes, she sees an advertisement from Ray Palmer, the former CEO of PalmerTech, who says that monsters are real and walk among them, and people can learn more by coming to PalmerX 2019.

The Legends watch the commercial and Sara says that they it's time for them to fight back and retake the Time Bureau. She has Gideon create an arsenal in the fabricator, and has Mick and Tate handle Fairy Godmother while Ava and Sara deal with Neron. Nate feels a kick from the dragon egg, and Sara tells them to focus because Neron is up to something big. Gideon puts through a call from Nora, who has snuck into the Bureau and is using her magic to fight her way to Mona. She tells them that Gary is in Ava's office getting comfortable.

In Ava's office, Gary is getting a massage and calls on Fairy Godmother so he can make his next wish. She suggests that he make a wish regarding the Legends and points out that they lied to him. Gary asks if Constantine is okay in Hell, and Fairy Godmother figures that he's screwed.

In Hell, a demon spots Constantine and recognizes him, and drives after him.

At the Bureau, Neron tells an imprisoned Mona that that he and Hank were training monsters to do his bidding. Mona starts to transform into Wolfie and Neron has an agent torture her with an electrical prod.

Gary eats popcorn and remembers that the Legends lied to him.

Ava starts to open a portal, but then she, Nora, and Sara are teleported to Gary's book club in his office. He says that he wants to discuss The Collector, and Ava asks him what happened to the Bureau creed. Gary notes that Ava started a book club without including him, and Sara points out that Neron is torturing Mona. When Gary doesn't respond, Sara suggests that they read the book first. Gary makes a wish to have them read it at superspeed. Nate calls on the comms, and Sara explains that they're at book club and should go to Plan B. Zari figures that they should sneak into PalmerTech and find out what Neron is up to.

Constantine walks through Hell and asks a prostitute that he's looking for Masher. He offers her holy water in return for her knowledge, and she directs Constantine to a strip club and addresses him by name. She warns that half of demonkind is looking for him, and Constantine says that the flask of "holy water" is whiskey and leaves.

Gary tries to discuss the book, and when they attack him Fairy Godmother attacks them. She says that they hate Gary, and Gary figures that they'd love to spend time with him as Captain of the Waverider. Fairy Godmother teleports Sara and Ava to Waverider along with Captain Gary, and then tells Nora that she has no quarrel with her. Nora asks why she's helping Neron, and Fairy Godmother explains that Neron rescued her from Hell and true love bloomed. Nora plays along but then teleports her to PalmerX. Neron is there and tells her that if she attacks him then Mona dies. He says that Damien is going mad in the pits of Hell, and he's decided to make Nora sit front row to all of the hate and fear that he's going to unleash while wearing Ray's body. The reporters come in to ask Ray about PalmerX.

The Legends infiltrate PalmerX and sit in the audience, and Neron comes out and says that he's created an exosuit capable of fighting magical creatures. He needs the people to help him find the creatures and tells them to take out their Smartphones. Neron explains that he wants them to create his new App, Eyes, which will let them report monster sightings so he can come there. A reporter asks for proof that monsters exist, and Neron has his people bring out Mona.

Constantine goes to the strip club and finds Masher, and explains that he's there to save a friend. He figures that nobody can get into Neron's soul vault except the Triumvirate, and asks what Neron is trading at. Masher tells him that Neron is going to make a major soul collection on Earth, and Constantine figures that Neron is going to make his play for the King of Hell. The demon hunting Constantine, Calabraxis, comes at him and prepares to throw him over a railing. Constantine asks for a parley and demands to speak for the Triumvirate, and notes that if Calabraxis dies then his soul belongs to Neron and the Triumvirate can't torture him.

Gideon gives Gary reports on magical creatures, while Sara and Ava laugh at his jokes.

Neron explains that Mona is a Kaupe.

Gary wants more people on the bridge.

Neron tells Mona to shift or end up dead like Koname. She transforms as the reporters snap photos, and Neron says that it's proof of werewolves. Wolfie throws the agents guarding her away.

Gary figures that they're missing the boys.

As Nate and the others prepare to blast Neron, he subdues Mona. Nate and Mick disappear, and Zari unleashes her powers. Neron leads the audience in a chant that she's a witch, and as Zari flees Neron says that she won't get far as long as everyone downloads the app.

Nate and Mick appear on Waverider, and Sara says that Zari and Charlie are their last hope. Gary emerges wearing the Kid Steel costume, and Nate and Mick aren't impressed. Sara and Zari play along.

At the Bureau, Neron gets a report that there have only been 2,000 downloads of the app. He figures that a monster attack on the capital will trigger more downloads. Fairy Godmother arrives and tells her to escort Nora to a cell. She takes Nora to Mona's cell and says that they might be able to help each other because they're both witches. Fairy Godmother says that she's just a Fairy Godmother away and teleports off.

Zari takes Charlie to her 2019 childhood home and explains that in 2021 they'll be forced by ARGUS to move to a ghetto. She looks at the fine print on Neron's app and finds an entry saying that the user forfeits their soil to Neron.

Gary captures a fairy at a bakeoff and leads it off into Waverider. Sara contacts Zari and Charlie, who tell her that Neron is using the app to collect souls and he's planning a monster attack to get more downloads while they get the magical creatures out of the Bureau. Gary wonders what's going on, and Nate tries to schmooze him. Sara insists that Gary is their friend and he's an interim Legend, and Gary tells them that they just promised that so they could use him as bait. Gary insists that he was just trying to protect them and doesn't deserve to be treated as a joke, and now the joke is on them. He summons Fairy Godmother and has her turn Mick into a "big baby". Gary has Nate turned into a high school nerd, and forces Sara and Ava to dance faster and faster.

Charlie tells Zari that she could end up captured or dead trying to break into the Bureau. Nora says that they can save her family'y present, and Charlie agrees and young Zari and her mother return. The two Legends slip out and Young Zari sees the dragon egg that Zari left behind.

Constantine goes to the Triumvirate's manor and chats with Satan, Belial, and Beelzebub. He tells them that Neron is trying to take control of Hell and he plans to disrupt the system. Constantine offers to act as their agent in return for Ray's soul. If the Triumvirate lets him leave Hell with Ray's soul then he will dedicate his services to defeating Neron. The Triumvirate say that they thought he was there to save Astra Logue's soul, and Constantine says that he'll take both of them. They offer him the choice, of Ray or Astra, and summon both souls. Both souls beg Constantine to take them back to Earth, and Constantine remembers losing Astra to a demon. He says that he chooses Astra over Ray.

A shapeshifted Charlie slips into the Bureau and escorts Zari out as the first part of releasing all of the prisoners.

Nate tells Gary that it's not him, and Gary finally relents and turns everyone back to normal.

Nora wakes up Mona briefly, and then calls to Fairy Godmother. Fairy Godmother tells Gary that they're not friends and teleports away. Ava apologizes to Gary for taking advantage of him, and Sara says that the Legends were the original losers and Gary doesn't have to be cool to be a legend. She assures Gary that he's one of them, and Nate asks him to use his Fairy Godmother powers for good.

Nora asks Fairy Godmother to save Mona, and Fairy Godmother says that she can't but if Nora takes the wand then she'll take the curse and all of her power and become a Fairy Godmother. Mona tells Nora not to, but Nora takes the wand and becomes Fairy Godmother. Mona wishes to be save on Waverider, and Tabitha says that Nora is forced to take on Gary's charge.

The disguised Charlie takes on the form of Marilyn Monroe and vamps an agent, asking him to take her back home. She knocks him out and drags him away, then takes the form of Fairy Godmother. Neron sees her and Charlie plays along, and tries to convince her. Charlie backs away and excuses herself, gets into an elevator, and transforms herself back to her normal form. She contacts Zari and says that she's heading for her first cell.

As Neron prepares to release a minotaur on DC, Tabitha arrives. Neron realizes that he met Charlie earlier and has the agents set off the force field. Charlie shuts off the force fields holding the magical creatures prisoner, and then uses a time courier to open a portal to Waverider. She tells the prisoners that it's a jailbreak.

On Waverider, Gary summons Nora without seeing her face, and tells her to rescue Constantine and Ray from Hell.

The prisoners go through the portal. Zari checks the surveillance cameras and warns Charlie that Neron and Tabitha are coming. Charlie closes the portal and goes to get Mona, and then Tabitha arrives and immobilizes her. Charlie opens a portal and has Zari get Mona out. Tabitha says that they can use Charlie for their staged monster attack.

Beelzebub takes Constantine to a door with his name on it. Astra calls to Constantine and then steps forward in adult form. Constantine offers her hand, and the adult Astra says that she isn't going to go back to Earth. Beelzebub says that torturing Constantine is too much fun. Constantine takes the knob to the cell and finds himself in a torture lab. Astra says that Hell has made her more like him, and he insists that she's not like him. Unimpressed, Astra tells him that he should have saved Ray. Calabraxis comes in wielding a knife and starts cutting.

Zari tells the other Legends that she convinced Zari to stay behind. Gary starts to slink off, and Sara and Ava tell him that they'll need all of their friends to defeat Neron. Nate hugs Zari and tells her that he's glad she and Wicksty are okay, and Zari realizes that she left the egg behind.

Written by Gadfly on May 14, 2019

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