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The Scratchmaker Recap

Blaine sits in a jail cell and contemplates the past.


At the Scratching Post, Don E looks on as a wedding party celebrates. A matchmaker, Carol Barbera, comes over and comments on Don E's dating chances. She tells Don E that she has the perfect girl for him. Don E wonders how she knows, and Carol says that it's intuition. The groom's mother comes over and complains that there are people picketing outside, and asks if Don is a monster.


Major talks to Blaine in prison and he says that he needs him to tell him the details of his brain smuggling operation or they'll run out of brains for zombies in three days. Blaine refuses unless Major gets him out, and Major says that if he gets him out then there will be rioting in the streets.

Liv and Ravi examine Carol's corpse and discuss Blaine. Ravi figures that Blaine is getting what he deserves, but Liv notes that the city will fall apart if they don't get Blaine's brains. Clive comes in and says that a red button found at the scene doesn't belong to Carol.


Blaien says that it isn't Carol's story, but his.


Cavanaugh and Dale have Blaine brought in and asks him how it is like being the most hated man in Seattle. Dale points out that they have him on Baracas' murder after Al printed the photo of the mask that was used in the murder. Blaine's lawyer Brandt Stone comes in and tells them to leave. Once they do, Brandt tells Blaine that he's seen worse from a legal angle but not a PR angle, covers the cameras, and says that he'll file bail. Blaine says that he needs to send a message to an associate. Once Brandt confirms that Blaine's check has cleared, Blaine writes down a note saying "365 degrees".

Major and Hobbs talk to Don E at Blaine's office, and Don E says that he doesn't know anything about Blaine's operation. Disgruntled, Don E says that he'll have to talk to Blaine about it, even though Major offers him the same contract they had with Blaine. Stacey and his bodyguard come in and Stacey says that it's time to make a deal. The crime boss says that he's been finding brains throughut the world and Don E distributes, and Blaine doesn't do anything. He wants to cut Blaine out entirely, but Major will have to pay double what he was paying Blaine. Major says that he doesn't have the budget, and Stacey warns that his prices won't come down after zombies start ripping people apart.

Once Major says that he'll consider it and leaves, Stacey tells Don E that he needed to make a dramatic entrance. He asks if Blaine would be as loyal to Don E, and Stacey says that they have a winning hand. Major listens in via a hidden mike.

Brandt slips through the crowd of picketeers and gives the message to Don E. The liquor isn't coming in, and the lawyer figures that they've frozen Blaine's assets. Liv and Clive come in, and the lawyer eats the note after eating it. Brandt advises Don E not to talk and leaves, and Don E asks Liv if she knows the name of his "perfect woman" because Liv ate Carol's brain. Don E tries to trigger a vision but nothing happens, and he says that Carol argued with Candy and sends them back to talk.

Major talks to the chiefs of staff, warning that zombies will become desperate and start scaling the walls. He warns that it could be all of their problems. Once the chief cut off, they discuss what to do. General Glenn Mills suggests that they use the brains they had stockpiled before they cut off Seattle. The chairman is surprised at the change in his attitude and moves on to the next topic.

Brandt tells Blaine that Blaine's assets are frozen, but he can get him off if he pays his retainer. Blaine says that he has to make some calls, and has Brandt call Don E. Don E says that they don’t have any customers and the reserve funds are low. Blaine has Don E find a hidden bag containing $50,000, and asks Don E to loan him $10,000 when Don E reports that the stash is $10,000 low. Don E says that he'll get the money. Cavanaugh and a pregnant Dale come in and reveal that his home is burning. She wants to accuse him of destroying evidence, but Blaine points out that he's the most hated man in Seattle.

Reporters talk to Dolly, who says that she's head from her contacts that there are no more brains. Major watches the broadcast, and Hobbs says that the joint chiefs left a message that they're not sending brains. He also says that Blaine made bail.

Don E takes Blaine to the basement of his home. Once Don E leaves, his mother comes down to do the laundry.

Voss and Moss meet with a contact, Riley, and tell her how to infiltrate Renegade's organization.

Al arrives at her apartment and takes a call from Blaine, and refuses protective custody. Once she hangs up, Blaine comes in and says that he wants to scare her. He admits that he killed the people and her story was correct, and he'll probably kill her. Blaine is telling her so she can live in fear that it's coming. Al notes that she showed people what he really is, and says that his "charming rascal" act didn't work on her. She dismisses him as a two-bit homicidal thug who wanted admiration from Peyton. Al says that Peyton called him "her greatest embarrassment". When Blaine rages out, Al draws a gun on him and her eyes glow red. Blaine gets control of himself and Al tells him to leave.

Don E enters the Scratching Post office and finds Blaine on the computer. Blaine says that he's looking for the list of bidders on his zombie auction, and asks if he's seen Dale. They wonder how she got pregnant, and Blaine finds the list of runner-up bidders. Tanner brings the money in, and Blaine takes it and gets the money. The remaining four cures are missing, and Tanner says that the cops pulled him over and he ditched them before they found them. Blaine rages out and kills him, and blames Don E for not handling it himself, and walks out.

Later, Stacey comes into the office to meet with Don E, and says that Fillmore Graves folded thanks to the pressure Dolly put on them. Stacey wonders about Tanner's bloodstains, and Don E says that it belongs to a friend. They talk about old drug-dealing times, and Stacey tells Don E that he respects his loyalty to Blaine. Don E tells Stacey that he's in and they share a toast.

Liv and her organization meet with Riley while Moss looks on. Moss vouches for her, and Riley says that they met at school. Liv, channeling Carol's brain, says that she'll help Riley meet someone who is right for her. Curtis wonders if Riley passed, and Liv agrees. They drink a secretly spiked toast, and Riley reacts to the ghost pepper as if she was human. Satisfied, Liv tells Riley that she's passed.

Major announces that there is brain rationing, and the news features Dolly saying that when the zombies run out of brains, they'll go after humans. Hobbs reports that Don E and Stacey have cut Blaine out of the operation.

Al returns to her penthouse and finds her uncle Stacey and his bodyguard there. Once she greets him, he offers her the brain of a Tibetan monk to clear Blaine off the board. Stacey says that FC is about to fold and then they'll split up the money.

Major visits Dolly at her food truck and threatens to shut her down for discrimination if she doesn't serve him. Once Dolly does, Major calls on the radio to call in all of his FG zombie troopers to eat, scaring off the human customers. Dolly complains to Major that he can't frighten her off. One trooper, Murphy, tells his mother Dolly to chill out. She isn't interested and walks off, and Murphy tells Major not to underestimate Dolly because she really hates zombies.

Liv talks to Ravi about setting up Major up on a blind date with Riley. Major comes in and immediately realizes that Liv is on matchmaker brain but isn't interested. He asks about Beanpole Bob, the person who created Utopium. Ravi has ordered night-vision goggles and explains that he plans to steal back his cure from Blaine using cat burglar brain. Major points out that he could have gotten the goggles for free, and gets an idea.

The next day, Major meets with Mr. Ty Griss, the local head of UFreightEze, the company that delivered the goggles. Major explains that they've disassociated with Blaine, and Griss says that he doesn't know how to get brains. In response, Major says that none of it matters.

At the Scratching Post, Candy complains that the place is dead. Don E says that they need a makeover, and Candy suggests that that they rename the brothel "Cold Cocks" Liv and Clive come in and say that they need to talk to Candy, and Liv gets a memory flash from a napkin that Don E has been sketching a skull tattoo on. She doesn't get the name of Don E's perfect girl.

Later, Liv and Clive question Mrs. Schwartz, who dropped a coat off at Caring Light. Schwartz denies that she dropped it off being captured on camera, and says that she went to a movie with Mavis Janning, who left ten minutes into the show to meet with her lover, Bernard Selkin. Liv points out that they have mutual alibis and asks if she killed Carol, and Carol says that the matchmaker set her son up with a zombie. Clive notices Dale in the next room crying and goes to ask if she's okay. Dale says that she's okay but uncomfortable, and Clive assures Dale that he's got her and will take her to the OB to have her checked out. He assures her that he has her covered, and Dale says that he sounds dorky. Liv watches through the window and smiles, and then has Schwartz write down her confession.

Stacey goes to the Scratching Post and Don E wonders when FG is going to fold. Candy shows them video of a UFreightEze billboard saying that they'll bring in brains to Seattle, and Don E and Stacey realize that they're screwed. They go to see Major, who says that UFreightEze will handle the supply chain and the shipping. Griss is including brain donor cards with all of their shipments, and will do it for 90% of their original deal with Blaine. Don E offers 80%, and Stacey confirms that it's official. Major agrees but says that the new face will remain on the billboards, replacing Blaine as the "face" of the brain operation.

When Don E returns to the Scratching Post, he finds Blaine there pouring himself a drink. Blaine wonders why no one is there and he's pouring his own drinks, and Don E says that they're trying some new ideas since Blaine's reputation is gone and the bar is their only remaining source of income. Don E has renamed the bar, and suggests that Blaine stay out of sight. He tells Blaine that FG has a new brain supplier, and asks why he kept the mask. Blaine has no answer, and Don E walks away. Furious, Blaine mutters that Don E is out of the brain business but he's not.

Blaine goes to Brandt's apartment and hears him having sex. Brandt eventually comes out, and Blaine says that he needs a contract drawn up and will pay quid pro quo. The judge comes out and sees Blaine, and goes back into the bedroom, and Brandt asks what contract Blaine needs drawn up.

Later, Blaine visits Darcy Bennett in her dorm room. Darcy has Freylich, and Blaine offers her $500,000 for her brain once she "inevitably" dies.

Liv is eating UFreightEze brain tube in Clive's new office. Clive arrives and explains that he's an acting lieutenant until Dale is back on her feet. He sets up his things and Liv jokingly asks for various perks.

Blaine takes Darcy to the buyer, a rich zombie, and explains that he gets the brain upon Darcy's death. He offers to arrange for Darcy's death for a non-nominal fee. The millionaire says that he'll wire the money.

Written by Gadfly on Jun 7, 2019

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