Crowley drives through London and tries to call Aziraphale at the bookstore, but gets no answer. The shop is burning, and Crowley arrives there. He goes inside and calls to Aziraphale, and wonders where he is. An explosion knocks him down, and Crowley figures that someone killed his best friend. He sees Agnes' book of prophecy lying on the floor.
Adam tells Them that it's a bad world but they can fix it, and he has better friends then they'll ever be. His new friends will be there soon and then they'll make everything better.
Crowley emerges from the shop, drops his sunglasses on the street, and walks to his Bentley. He drives away, grabs a spare pair of sunglasses from the glove compartment and puts them on.
A shocked Shadwell goes to his flat and rings the bell. When Madame Tracy answers, Shadwell says that he exorcised a demon and Tracy tells him that he needs to come in and have a cup of tea. They go to her flat and Tracy tells him to lie down on her bed and have a rest. Once she leaves, Shadwell figures that no one has ever done what he's done and he's the ultimate weapon and the doomsday option.
Aziraphale arrives in Heaven and finds the angels gearing for war. The Quartermaster tells him that he's late and Aziraphale explains that he didn't mean to be there and is still sorting things out on Earth. Despite that, the Quartermaster gives him equipment and asks where his body is. Aziraphale realizes that his body discorporated when he stepped into the circle, and the Quartermaster says that he's a pathetic excuse for an angel. When Aziraphale says that he doesn't plan to fight in the war, he demands to be returned to Earth and says that he'll possess a body like a demon since he doesn't have one. He goes to a nearby model of Earth and touches England, and disappears.
Adam says that they'll get rid of everything stupid in the world and start over again, and Pippin cries. Despite that, Adam insists that it's the best day of all and demands that they smile. He gives them back their mouths and makes them smile.
Anathema gets dressed, and Newton says that the sex was amazing. He admits that it was his first time, and suggests that they do it again. Anathema tells him that they don't have time and points out Agnes' prophecy that says they only did it once. Newton figures that they find Adam and stop him, but Anathema notes that there's no prophecy with instructions and Agnes didn't tell them how to do it. He wonders if she ever does things and sees how they turn out, and Anathema says that she doesn't as far as the important things, and if they don't do something soon then nobody will do anything ever again.
Crowley goes to a bar and drinks, and laments how he got drawn into the rebellion. Aziraphale appears but as a ghost that only Crowley can see, and admits that he's made a mess of things. Crowley admits that he lost his best friend, and Aziraphale tells him to get a book from his book shop. The demon explains that the shop burned down except for Agnes' book, and Crowley says that he took it. All of Aziraphale notes are in it, and Aziraphale tells Crowley to get to Tadfield Airbase and he'll head there once he finds a receptive body. He says that they have to get moving and fades away.
Tracy's customers arrive to "receive her wisdom", and Tracy begins her séance... after getting her donations.
The Four Horsemen make their separate ways to Tadfield for the end of the world. War arrives first and orders tea for everyone. Famine arrives next and greets his fellow Horseman, and then Pollution. A helmeted Death is already there, paying video trivia, and comes over.
Tracy goes into a trance to find her spirit guide, Colleen, who starts talking through Tracy. She fishes for information from her customers but doesn't do very well at it. Aziraphale possesses Tracy, tries out her body, and then puts another customer, Brenda, in contact with the spirit of her dead husband. The spirit arrives and Brenda natters on, Ron finally says that she never let him get a word in edgewise and yells at her to shut up. Ron leaves and Aziraphale orders them to get out because he has a world to save.
Afterward, Aziraphale pours tea and sees himself rather than Tracy in the mirror.
Crowley gets stuck in a traffic jam on the M25 as he heads to Tadfield to find Adam. He considers the irony that he helped designed it in the 1970s to form a sigil hailing the Great Beast and generating a miasma of evil around London.
Shadwell wakes up, and comes out to hear Tracy and Aziraphale talking. There's no sign of Aziraphale, but Aziraphale tells him who he is. Shadwell figures that he's a demon, and orders him out of Tracy. Tracy takes over and explains that Aziraphale told her what is going on and offers to make a nice cup of tea.
On the M25, a driver gets out to urinate and says, "Hail the Great Beast". All of the other drivers join in, Cars explode, causing the M25 to form a magical ring of fire surrounding London so nobody could get in or out... including Crowley. Crowley drives off the road and heads for Tadfield.
Trapped on the answering machine tape, Hastur hears Aziraphale's message about where the Antichrist is. Lisa with telephone sales auto-dials Crowley's phone and reaches Hastur, freeing him. He goes down the telephone line and oozes out of her microphone as a wave of maggots, killing everyone in the call center and forming a new body for himself.
Aziraphale tells Shadwell that the Antichrist is bring about Armageddon and Shadwell must kill him. Shadwell points out that he's a witchfinder, not an Antichristfinder, but Aziraphale says that the Antichrist has lots of weapons, convincing the sergeant. The human has the Thunder Gun of Witchfinder Dairyimple, and figures they can shoot bricks at the Antichrist. Shadwell gets the Thunder Gun and marches out.
Crowley comes to the burning barrier and looks through the book, and Hastur appears next to him in the Bentley and breaks Crowley's sunglasses. Hastur says that Crowley will never escape London and he's done. Crowley drives toward the barrier and Hastur screams that Crowley will discorporate them both. The other demon doesn't care, figuring that at least he'll go out with style. Hastur discorporates in the flames, and Crowley orders his car not to burn. He imagines that he's just fine and the car is fine, and since he's the only demon with imagination so he survives.
Two policemen on the other side of the flames see Crowley drive out of the flames, and he waves to them as he goes past in the flaming car.
Adam makes Them normal so that they can play a new game and meet his new friends. He hovers over the forest and calls to the Horsemen, and then drops down and says that they can still be friends and they can have the world that's left. Pepper wonders what Adam will do, and he says that he'll be in Tadfield, his home. Adam says that they're not frozen anymore and doesn't care where they go, and they say goodbye and leave. The Antichrist hovers after them and they run, Dog going with them, and the voices in Adam's head says to let them go because he has the world.
Flying up to Them, Adam ask the kids to give him back his dog. Pepper says that Dog is its own dog and it doesn't like Adam anymore, and they kids tell Adam that he should fix the world rather than destroy it. They walk away and Adam begs them to come back. When they don't, he screams in anguish and across the world, people hear him. Adam collapses to the ground, unconscious, and his friends go to him. Dog licks at Adam's face, and Adam wakes up and apologizes to Them. He admits that he wasn't thinking straight but is now.
The storms clear and as Them return to Tadfield, Adam tells the others that he has to start what he started. He asks them to get their bicycles and meet him in five minutes so that they can get to the end of the world.
Newton suggests that Anathema needs to pick any prophecy card. Anathema does so and Newton reads the car. The prophecy says that the two of the must stand between love and war, where the iron bird lands no more. They realize that the "iron bird" refers to Tadfield Air Base where they don't land planes anymore. All they have left is computer technology, and realize how Armageddon can be set off.
Aziraphale/Tracy, with Shadwell on the back, drives a motorcycle toward the barrier. The angel figures that they need a miracle and tells Shadwell to hold on tight. The scooter miraculously flies into the air.
The Horsemen arrive in Tadfield and ask Tyler for directions to the air base. Tyler gives them directions and they continue on.
Anathema and Newton drive to the air base, and Newton worries that the guards might shoot or capture them.
The Horseman arrive at the air base and approach the base posing as a general and his entourage on a surprise inspection. They have the proper ID and tells the officer not to tell them that they're coming.
Newton and Anathema pull up near the air base and slip through the fence where a branch has created a gap. Anathema knows about it because Agnes wrote about it, and tells Newton that all of the prophecies have led her there.
Them meets and Adam figures that the Horsemen will patch into the worldwide military net and have every computer in the world launch automated attacks.
The Horsemen go into the Quonset hut holding the computers.
Tyler sees Them and tells them to stop. He wonders where they're going, and Adam explains that they're going to the air base and doesn't care whether Tyler tells their parents.
In the computer room, Death causes all of the officers to die with a glance. War assures them that in five minutes the world will be at war, and then famine and pollution come. They access the computers and take control of every computer on the worldwide military net. Missiles prepare to launch from silos and submarines, and War announces that the final countdown has begun.
Crowley drives into Tadfield in his burning car, and asks Tyler for directions to the air base. He assumes that the burning Bentley is a practical joke and provides the directions.
Aziraphale/Tracy and Shadwell arrive at the air base and the guard confronts them. Shadwell threatens him with the finger he thought he used to exterminate Aziraphale, and Aziraphale asks to speak to the person in charge. Tracy interrupts and they argue, and the guard isn't convinced. Crowley arrives and gets out, and Aziraphale greets his friend. Adam opens the gate and Them ride through as the launch alarms go off.
The Horsemen sense Adam and figure that when he joins them, they will be complete.
Written by Gadfly on Jun 8, 2019