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Season 9 - Episode Guide

Episodes

Nice to Meet You, Walden Schmidt

Episode: 9x01 | Airdate: Sep 19, 2011

Nice to Meet You, Walden Schmidt

Ashton Kutcher joins the cast as Walden Schmidt, an internet billionaire with a broken heart.

Big Girls Don't Throw Food

Episode: 9x03 | Airdate: Oct 3, 2011

Big Girls Don't Throw Food

Alan prepares Walden for a date with Bridget, while Jake decides to emulate Walden and drop out of school.

Nine Magic Fingers

Episode: 9x04 | Airdate: Oct 10, 2011

Nine Magic Fingers

Trying to rebound from his recent separation, Walden goes looking for Mrs. Right, while Alan has an opportunity to reconcile with Lyndsey.

A Giant Cat Holding a Churro

Episode: 9x05 | Airdate: Oct 17, 2011

A Giant Cat Holding a Churro

Alan struggles to come to terms with Lyndsey's risque movie past, and Walden tries to cheer him up by throwing a party at the house.

The Squat and the Hover

Episode: 9x06 | Airdate: Oct 24, 2011

The Squat and the Hover

Walden receives divorce papers from Bridget, but forgets his depression when he meets a girl who looks eerily like her.

Those Fancy Japanese Toilets

Episode: 9x07 | Airdate: Oct 31, 2011

Those Fancy Japanese Toilets

Jake has a crush on his chemistry tutor, who has a crush on Walden. Meanwhile, Alan obsesses over the journal his brother left him in his will.

Thank You for the Intercourse

Episode: 9x08 | Airdate: Nov 7, 2011

Thank You for the Intercourse

When Walden begins redecorating the beach house, Alan becomes overly emotional.

Frodo's Headshots

Episode: 9x09 | Airdate: Nov 14, 2011

Frodo's Headshots

Upon his release from the hospital, Alan is met with a slew of challenges that test his ability to cope.

A Fishbowl Full of Glass Eyes

Episode: 9x10 | Airdate: Nov 21, 2011

A Fishbowl Full of Glass Eyes

Walden hits it off with a British babe, but neither of them is sure he's ready to re-enter the dating world.

What a Lovely Landing Strip

Episode: 9x11 | Airdate: Dec 5, 2011

What a Lovely Landing Strip

Walden is trying his best to impress his new love interest when Bridget reappears in his life.

One False Move, Zimbabwe!

Episode: 9x12 | Airdate: Dec 12, 2011

One False Move, Zimbabwe!

Walden's mother arrives and Alan is smitten with her, even as she reveals a secret about Walden's past that sends him into a downward spiral.

Slowly and in a Circular Fashion

Episode: 9x13 | Airdate: Jan 2, 2012

Slowly and in a Circular Fashion

When Walden's ex-wife and his mother try to take control of his company, he tries to enlist Alan as an ally.

A Possum on Chemo

Episode: 9x14 | Airdate: Jan 16, 2012

A Possum on Chemo

Zoey tries to coerce Walden into cutting his hair and shaving. Meanwhile, Alan and Lyndsey rekindle their relationship.

The Duchess of Dull-in-Sack

Episode: 9x15 | Airdate: Feb 6, 2012

The Duchess of Dull-in-Sack

Walden tries to loosen up Zoey by sharing a couple of Berta's special brownies.

Sips, Sonnets and Sodomy

Episode: 9x16 | Airdate: Feb 13, 2012

Sips, Sonnets and Sodomy

Strained relationships and girl-fighting result when a huge storm traps Walden, Alan, Zoey and Lyndsey in the house on Valentine's Day.

Not in My Mouth!

Episode: 9x17 | Airdate: Feb 20, 2012

Not in My Mouth!

Walden and Zoey's relationship suffers after they share a near-death experience. Meanwhile, Alan wonders if Lyndsey has a drinking problem.

The War Against Gingivitis

Episode: 9x18 | Airdate: Feb 27, 2012

The War Against Gingivitis

Things get tense in the Malibu house when Walden's estranged ex-business partner shows up looking to bury the hatchet.

Palmdale, Ech

Episode: 9x19 | Airdate: Mar 19, 2012

Palmdale, Ech

Alan and Lyndsey introduce their mothers to one another. Meanwhile, Jake and Eldridge enlist Walden to drive them to a high school party.

Grandma's Pie

Episode: 9x20 | Airdate: Apr 9, 2012

Grandma's Pie

Walden breaks the news to Zoey that he is going into business with his ex-wife. Meanwhile, Alan and Lyndsey try to come to terms with their moms' new relationship.

Mr. Hose Says 'Yes'

Episode: 9x21 | Airdate: Apr 16, 2012

Mr. Hose Says 'Yes'

Walden's commitment is tested when Zoey and her daughter come to live with him. Meanwhile, Alan gets more than he bargained for when he moves in with Lyndsey.

Why We Gave Up Women

Episode: 9x22 | Airdate: Apr 30, 2012

Why We Gave Up Women

After Alan suffers a minor heart attack, Charlie's ghost pays a visit to his hospital bedside.

The Straw in My Donut Hole

Episode: 9x23 | Airdate: May 7, 2012

The Straw in My Donut Hole

Alan is showered with love and affection upon returning from the hospital, but Zoey isn't so sure it's deserved.

Oh Look! Al-Qaeda!

Episode: 9x24 | Airdate: May 14, 2012

Oh Look! Al-Qaeda!

Jake is pressured to make a decision about his future.

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